Catching Up with Movies

Oh, yeah, movies. How about them movies, eh? Movies!

I forgot to ever put down what I thought about the two movies I saw weeks ago, which were American Ultra and Sinister 2. You can put me in the boat with the people who liked American Ultra. Not loved, mind you, but it's a reasonably entertaining movie. Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart are both likeable, yes even Stewart, and there's some amusing bits. I give it a B-. Sinister 2, on the other hand, was a total cashgrab; nowhere near as creepy, involving, or effective as the original. I give it a C for crap.

And if you wanna see some even worse crap, look no further than Transporter Refueled, which stars an emotionless plank of wood and features not one single exciting action scene. My first impression was a shrug-worthy C-, but upon further introspection I realize that would be unfair. This movie did nothing for me. It gets a D.

Two new movies that are more in the C+, not bad or good range are No Escape and A Walk in the Woods. The former stars an awful Owen Wilson as a man and his family trapped in unspecific Asia during life-threatening riots. It has some scattered moments of genuine thrills, but some of it is kind of cheap, none of it is particularly original, and, again, Owen Wilson is awful. The latter stars Robert Redford and the re-animated corpse of Nick Nolte as old men who decide to hike the Appalachian Trail, but, and this is the hilarious part, they're old! DO YOU GET IT?! It has some dumb moments, but some amusing moments to make up for it. Neither of these movies are worth going out of your way to see, but they're harmless if you do.

Also, playing in limited theatrical release and available on Netflix is a found footage horror movie called Creep. The critical consensus seems to be that this is one of the few great movies of its genre, but I don't quite agree. It has some good creepy moments, without question, and star Mark Duplass is excellent, but it's not for a second believable as a true story and the jump scares are obnoxiously overdone. It's ok at best. B-

Now for the movies I did like that you've never heard of!

Queen of Earth is an Ingmar Bergman-esque drama about a very crazy girl who is trying to escape a recent break-up by spending a week with her friend in a cabin. That's it, but the joy of the movie is in its style, which studies the bland situations with an eerie dread that builds to an emotionally intense madness. I like how quiet and mysterious it is and the performances! Katherine Waterston is great as the friend, but Elizabeth Moss is amazing as the insone one. Her acting in the first few minutes alone is among the most harrowing I've seen lately. I warn you that I realize this movie is not easy to love, so I'm only saying that I loved it, not actually recommending it. So don't come crying to me if you watch it and hate it. A

Call Me Lucky is a documentary about the extremely liberal, semi-antisocial, easily-angered, and legendary comedian Barry Crimmins. It was made by childhood friend Bobcat Goldthwait and it is a very loving examination of how this man has influenced modern comedy, and there's lots of interviews with recognizable stand-up artists and comedy actors who clearly love the guy. And then there's the dark stuff, which I won't go into, but if you don't know anything about Crimmins and are going to watch the movie, let it surprise you, like it did me. Crimmins went through some pretty horrible things in his life, and the movie becomes an examination of how on Earth he's kept on going. The fact that I don't think the guy is funny and find his political and religious views brash, to say the least, doesn't affect my enjoyment of the movie, which is a pretty powerful look at how it is possible to overcome life-altering trauma. A-

Speaking of documentaries that are dark and uplifting, I Am Big Bird: The Caroll Spinney Story is a sweet and informative movie about the guy who has played Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch since the characters were introduced on Sesame Street some 40 years ago. He's presented as a nice old man, with surprising candor about some of his experiences with depression. He's also got a lot of cool, behind-the-scenes stories about production of the show and his personal friendship with Jim Henson, and since his wife apparently films everything, there's some little-seen backstage footage to show off too. There's material and language that keep it from being kid-friendly, but this is really for the adults anyway, who grew up with Sesame Street, and therefore with Big Bird, and therefore with Carroll Spinney. B+

Finally, Turbo Kid is an obviously inexpensively made post-apocalyptic throwback adventure from Canada/New Zealand. It's one of those movies that's pretending it was made in the 80s, with the height of technology being a casette tape player, and although it's rarely convincing as such, it is consistently entertaining and sometimes even hilarious. There's a lot, and I mean a LOT, of ridiculously over-the-top gore effects and some intentionally cheesy dialogue (The action hero one-liners are no worse than they are in real action movies, though, which is sad.), but it's all part of the fun. Munro Chambers is fine as the main character, but his co-star Laurence LeBoeuf completely steals the show as a character that is energetic, funny, adorable, and butt-kicking. I'm not kidding that she alone bumped the movie from a B to a B+. Put this girl in more movies! And you can watch Turbo Kid for free right now if you have Amazon Prime.

I skipped We Are Your Friends with Zac Efron as a tool, or perhaps a douchebag. Time and interest also kept me from seeing The War Room. You may recall that I had a really bad experience with a Christian movie a couple months ago and I wasn't eager to repeat it, but I'll try to see this one within a week or two anyway, for science.

Below are movies I saw earlier last month ,but never wrote about here---

 Shaun the Sheep Movie-Loved it. It’s fun, cute, breezy, clever, well-animated, and a little hilarious too. It is the definite superior to Minions, so stop giving that thing money. A-

The Gift-Liked it. It’s more of a slow cooker than most of today’s average suspense thrillers, but still a very spooky, patient, and intriguing mystery with a good payoff. B+

Ricki and the Flash-Liked it. It’s a slightly above average 'dysfunctional family' dramedy with its fair share of laughs and awww moments, none of which are too heavy-handed. B+

Straight Outta Compton-Liked it. This one is quite heavy-handed, overlong, one-sided…and effective and entertaining, despite its flaws. B+

Irrational Man-Liked it. This is a strange but interesting (lots of philosophical talk) dark comedy done in a weirdly blasé style that I enjoyed even though it was occasionally off-putting. B

The Man from U.N.C.L.E.-Meh. It starts out pretty strong and then gets totally disconnected. It’s one of the duller action movies of the year. C+

Southpaw-Meh. If it weren’t for Jake Gyllenhaal’s very committed performance, there would be nothing here but trite, forceful faux emotion, Lifetime Original Movie style. C+

Fantastic Four-BOO! There’s almost no plot, conflict, or apparent desire for any of the cast to be bothering. This is the equivalent of a Superman movie where he does nothing but learn how to fly. D

Vacation-Didn't see it, because it can, with all due respect, bite me.